You are getting married or having a birthday party but you don’t know whether or not to invite coworkers without getting in a tight skirt or burning your movie for nonsense. The situation is very common. Almost everyone suffers from it or will suffer one day. The solution, however, can be much simpler than it sounds. Want to see? Check out these ten tips from image consultant Ana Vaz.

How to invite coworkers to a personal event

According to the expert, no one is required to invite anyone to a celebration of their own, whether from inside or outside of work, ”she says. Of course the way you are going to exercise the right to invite just who you really want to party can have a direct impact on your work life. Therefore, some care needs to be taken. These are:

1. Be discreet about the event.

In weddings, especially, which are expensive, no one has to have money to make a gigantic party. By the way, if you already know that you’re getting married and you’re not going to invite a lot of people, it’s best to make the least of the fuss about the event. Not to mention that small party fashions for 50 or 60 people are coming back, and that justifies that only a few close colleagues are invited.

2. Invite out of office

To avoid embarrassment, give the invitation to friends outside of the workplace. “Leave it to a lunch or a coffee outside the company or, if appropriate, go to the person’s house over the weekend to do this,” recommends the consultant. Ideally, the invitation should be delivered in an envelope that does not give much banner. Yes, disguising is possible and not harmful to anyone.

3. Ask guests for discretion

Ask the guests to be discreet. “If you are calling only the closest, they must understand your request,” she says. It’s not inelegant to do that, Ana says. Really inelegant would be to deliver three invitations on a wheel where four colleagues are talking. “This is poking and embarrassing everyone,” she says.

4. Invite by will – not by obligation

The recommendation is the same for a birthday party, an open house or any small meeting you decide to have with friends. Call who you want, but be discreet and avoid commenting on the event at the office. The tip goes even for your children’s birthday party. “There are a lot of people who think they need to call everyone who has a child and that’s not true,” says Ana. If your child is too young, you can invite your closest friends and family. If he is already bigger and has a circle of friendship, it is best to give preference to his guests. Whose party is it anyway? If there is no restriction on the number of guests, then yes, you can call friends from around the world. Again only by will, not by obligation.

5. Have the explanation ready

This is unlikely to happen, but… if someone comes to complain that they were not invited while the other colleagues went, you can say that they invited few people because the place was small. “Try going out on a tangent, and if it’s inevitable, you can use a social lie and say that next time you expect to be able to invite everyone, etc.,” says the consultant.

6. Do the same for others

On the other hand, if you have been invited to such an event and you know that not all office mates have been so lucky, be discreet, even if the party owner does not remember to make that request. The tip goes even for social networks. No more posting photos or comments for everyone to know where you are and what’s going on. This creates controversy. Now, if the party owner himself is doing it without worrying about the outcome and you think there will be no problem, ok. Can share the joy with friends.

7. Don’t take it personally

Well… If you were one of the “uninvited” to the party, the tip is not to be offended and really understand that not everyone is financially available to host a super event and invite everyone. “Think that you may not be so close to the person, mourn yourself (at most) and try to move your life forward.” So, no satisfying or frowning.